Natalie Grant Held

Memorial Day

As we approach Memorial Day many things come to mind but at the forefront of my mind is our beloved Mariana. No she never served in our nation’s Armed Forces but she had the privilege of being buried in the Abraham Lincoln National Cemetery. How might you ask is this possible if she was never a veteran as only veterans are allowed to be buried in a national cemetery or the veteran’s spouse. Well there is one loop hole that my husband Keith and I found out the hard way: You have a child that passes away and . . . → Click Here To Read More: Memorial Day

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Then it hits ya

Since moving here to Kentucky, I have fell in love with a program on the Style Channel. The program is called Clean House. If you have never seen it before, they take people who are clutter fanatics (and man there are some that are so nasty) and help them clean out the clutter, sell the stuff in a yard sale and then give them a makeover in the rooms they cleared out.

Well, they have a couple of shows that came from the original called Clean House: Search for the Messiest House in the Country and Clean House . . . → Click Here To Read More: Then it hits ya

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To Lose Weight or Not To Lose Weight: That is the Question

I am very disappointed in myself.  When I weighed myself this evening I weighed 1XX (did you honestly think I would say how much I weigh, yeah right.  LOL).  I am so disappointed in myself and how I have slowly been gaining weight.  In the last year I have put on another 10 pounds.  That is a lot of gosh darn weight.  If I keep at it I will be over 200 pounds in the next few years. 

The one good thing I have going for me is I am 5’7” tall.  When people look at me they . . . → Click Here To Read More: To Lose Weight or Not To Lose Weight: That is the Question

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Strength…

Strength: Where does it come from? Everyone always wants to tell me how strong I am for how I am today with dealing with the death of Mari. And I used to think the same thing when I saw a parent and how they were dealing with the death of a child. I would think to myself how incredibly strong that person must be to be dealing with the loss. The strength they have inside themselves must be so incredibly strong to be able to get through this incredibly hard time. I know I could never be that . . . → Click Here To Read More: Strength…

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It's time to get in shape

Well it has been awhile but a long time coming: I have officially starting working out again (of course it is only the first day, but you have to keep optimistic right).

I signed up for personal training this week on post. I went in this morning to have my very first session (or should I say second as the first time I met with my personal trainer she went over some guidelines and what not to get me started right). When I arrived I found out that she, I believe, fell down some stairs and could barely . . . → Click Here To Read More: It's time to get in shape

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Iris and Kristena

I sit here watching Mr. Holland’s Opus. I think this is one of those movies that just touch you to the depths of our soul. It has true meaning instead of what a lot of these movies out there today seem to lack. I think if you have seen this movie it has touched you in some way.

I have not really watched this movie in several years. As a matter of fact I do not remember the last time I watched it. It is a simple movie about a man named Glenn, or Mr. Holland, who . . . → Click Here To Read More: Iris and Kristena

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Love The One Your With

Well, I sit here at home today by myself as Keith has left on his first trip for his new position today.  He will only be gone until Thursday, another words 5 days and 4 nights.  When you put it into overall perspective, that is really not that long considering he is in the Army and he could be being deployed instead and be gone for a year or two.  But still, I hate it when he has to leave.

I am not one of those wives who actually looks forward to their husbands leaving for a few . . . → Click Here To Read More: Love The One Your With

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Just sitting here thinking

The last few days I have just been sitting here thinking about how I have come to truly love writing and then sharing it will all of you.  It gives me a peace inside that I never knew it could bring me.

When I was growing up, school was very hard for me, especially english.  I would say that english was my very hardest class and then history was next with trying to remember all those little factoids.  I can remember right after I graduated high school and I started to attend the local community college, I took . . . → Click Here To Read More: Just sitting here thinking

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Mari's Dress

I’ve spent the day trying to unpack the spare bedroom/office area. It is such time consuming work. Once in a while I run into something that was Mari’s. For the most part, all of her stuff was packed away and is in the storage unit we rented as our place is just too small to hold all of our stuff until we get on post housing.

I was just going through one of the boxes we had packed back up after the movers just half-assed put our stuff everywhere and was a big mess. As I was going . . . → Click Here To Read More: Mari's Dress

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Moving Time…

Well, the move is finally done. They pack up our house last month on the 14th, moved it out on the 15th, left for Kentucky on the 19th, ended up having an abscessed tooth from a root-canal from over 4 or 5 years ago, had oral surgery on the 22nd, finally started looking for places to live on the 23rd, found a place to rent on the 28th and put deposit down, signed new lease on May 3, transportation delivered our stuff on the 6th, had massive asthma attack in middle of night on the 6th (technically the . . . → Click Here To Read More: Moving Time…

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I Died

The day I died is a day I will never forget

There was nothing but emptiness and what seemed like utter despair

It seemed to envelop me like a black cloud unable to see or breathe

No one knows how they will die or if they will ever get to live again

I did not know what to do as all I saw was the blackness around me

The day I died was the day a new person became born and took my place

Time seemed to stand still until one unexpected moment, one unexpected day

Something was . . . → Click Here To Read More: I Died

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Changes

I sit here in our car as Keith and I are driving to DeKalb one last time before we move to Kentucky. I have nothing to write on at the moment so I took some brown napkins from my glove compartment to use instead (I guess they are not just for wiping your hands off after all).

Many things are happening right now in our lives. Many good-byes.

The other day we attended our last Parent-only grief group. It was definitely bitter-sweet. I can say without hesitation that this group is beyond special. It is a group of . . . → Click Here To Read More: Changes

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Paperwork Junkies

What, may you ask, is a “Paperwork Junky?” Well you might relate. It is those individuals who go out to check their mail, come back in the house and place it on the table (or where ever one might put their mail). It might get gone through right away or it might sit there and have other mail accumulate with it. If it gets gone through, the stuff that is obvious junk mail almost always gets thrown away. The other stuff more times than not will get put into a nice neat pile to get filed away for . . . → Click Here To Read More: Paperwork Junkies

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The dreaded deed has been done

It seems like recently everything has been going ok. I have been doing ok. We left on Thursday to go down to Ft. Knox, KY, because that is where Keith just received his order to report there in April. What we found out is that housing is of a valued commodity. We saw only 2 places, and those two may not even be available by the time we get down there. I guess it is what it is.

On the way back home on Saturday, Keith and I talked about how we need to seriously start thinking about . . . → Click Here To Read More: The dreaded deed has been done

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It's that time of year…

It’s that time of year again. That time of year everyone dreads yet some look forward to. What time of year is it you may ask? Well it is TAX TIME.

For most people this is just a time of year that is required by our federal government to report how much money we have made during the year and to try to find as many deductions as the IRS will allow to either pay the least amount of money possible, or, for those that are lucky, a refund.

Every year I would start getting all my documents . . . → Click Here To Read More: It's that time of year…

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